wutt???

Like buying a Louis Vuitton luggage or doing bungee-jumping, there are things that I do not  expect to happen in my lifetime. So when I was asked by my high school principal to be a keynote speaker for graduation, I realized that I missed to include something in my will-never-ever-ever-happen list.

I begged off respectfully, mentioning that it was an honor. I said in jest that the only thing I can be effective is when talk is about dressing up for success (to which, I miserably fail in practice). I even mentioned to him to invite me five years down the road-when I already have my nose done. But of course, I would have changed numbers then. I would have closed all my online social networks then. And possibly had relocated somewhere beyond Smart network’s reach then. (God, I hope it is not Heaven.)

Really, there is nothing to say much about being a poster boy for call center agents. Maybe, I can inspire them by saying that if they work hard enough to stay as an agent, they can  have a Starbucks cup without fear or worry. Sometimes, all the hardworking in the world is amounting to a trip to the cafe and having your espresso. See, I am so well-equipped in inspiring. 

I am almost resolved now to junking rhinoplasty. So in case I can be contacted, I will still have a very valid reason.

The mere thought of speaking to the graduates gives me constipation. I will take bungee-jumping at any time.

an open letter to edu manzano

Dear Sir,

When you declared the possibility that the sales of pirated DVD helps finance Abu Sayyaf, I hope you realize that it is a big statement. The "possibility" part, is a bit appalling because it connotes uncertainty. There’s a hint. Possibly there’s a chismis. But nothing concrete that supports the bigness of your statement.

Ano ba talaga, Kuya?

Show us the paper trail, the cash flow, the facts, the cold, cold facts and nothing but. A statement like this should be really, really certain. It should not be even made public if you just have a probable cause. It must be proven beyond doubt. Because if it’s not, then it has no place in venues like public television. There must be a boardroom meeting on this, a secret probe before its thrown like chicken meat into crocodile-infested media. Do you keep a video or photos replete with faces of culprits delivering the sacks of bills and coins from the nooks of Quiapo or Greenhills to the jungles of Basilan? Where is your proof? And if there is, is that conclusive?

We know exactly that media devours every story that is deemed news-worthy and delivers it as gospel truth. What if the world knows about it? They will look down on your less-than-responsible pronouncements. They will be judging you with your baselessness. And they will collectively call us just as baseless.

I hope that you understand what damage can a statement do to our national pride. It is not just you who will be subject to ridicule, it is us, too-the Filipino race that produced heroes like Rizal, Bonifacio and Aquino. We, who staged EDSA revolutions. We who turn the Senate from a legislative body into a forum so we can loudly denounce corruption and abuse of power.

Isn’t it enshrined in your own guidelines to be careful about statements like this?

(more…)

greta’s garb

I missed something on TV a few Sundays back -it was Gretchen in a Monique Lhuillier wedding gown as she launched her album. Yes, she sings. And since every singer in this country gets to have a diva title in its many modifications, I hardly can attribute that to Gretchen. She was a diva long before she has ever gotten a vocal coach.

Eversince a friend told me about it, I have been scouring the net for some stills or video. Its only now that I have seen the craziness of it all. And it is too fabulously crazy not to share. This one is a signature Gretchen stunt.

(more…)

i don’t wanna be rich anymore

In all my lonesome today, I bought a ticket to watch "The Kite Runner". The girl from behind the box office told me that I am going to see "The Kite Runner" like she doesn’t believe that I am watching "The Kite Runner". She even hastened to add like it is an not English movie. I just said, "I know it is not Tagalog". And she still was fumbling for words dying to explain to me that most of the lines are in Afghan. I curtly replied, "I can read subtitles" before she can gather her thoughts.

I have a record of watching some people would think as "art film". And I honestly enjoy it. What hurts me more is that when I feel I have an impressive resume that could make me labelled "moderately artsy"(haha), here I am, stripped by a ticket girl to shame. Does one need to ditch contact lens for thick glasses to pass up as intelligent? It is cliche to say not to rely on first impressions. But we are victims in as much as proliferators of judging by first impressions. Only this time, I am the victim. And even if I think I brilliantly defended my hurt ego, I think I lost this one.

This brings me to steeling myself to never get rich at all. Just think of  waiters asking for your valid ID every time you hand down your Platinum credit card. Hey, are you the security guard? It’s like every tear and sweat you shed for to reach the status of getting a high-limit card is nulled.

I remember an incident that happened to me when, horror of horrors, I was asked to present an ID to purchase a few pesos worth of a Tribal shirt(at that!). Thank God, she did not call the bank to verify my birthday. I could have all the grounds for a lawsuit.

trip to the movies (lifted from my blogspot account whose password I failed to recover)

star wars ( revenge of the sith) 

My trip to the movies two Sundays ago was a tribute to the closing of a childhood myth. I have steeled myself to never watch the last installment of the Star Wars saga because the space wars even in my childhood had no appeal to me at all. But the Force or the so-called P.R. drumbeatings made me troop to the cinema.

The fee was all worth it, it turned out. Hayden Christensen was a beauty, the lightsabers duel was astonishing, the space battles were made to look at least far off from pixelated computer games. There maybe some really unforgivable loopholes on the way the story was told but it was all forgiven. I was then, a bit recuperating from fever and the Force healed me because after the movie, I was again at the pink of health.

The movie experience I had last Sunday and Monday, was far from my worthwhile viewing rendezvous the last time. I have opted to watch La Visa Loca. If producers really poses itself as a comedy film, they could have thought of a funny title. Punning a Ricky Martin hit and an Osang movie is definitely uninventive.

 la visa loca

Jess Huson is the main character who personifies most of us who have American Dreams. His dream had brought him to the lenght that he mocks and humiliates himself. The film is both remembered for its depiction of our innermost longing with both pain and humor. Whatever comes first is barely recognizable. But it is apt that the pull of migration is due to the fact that we continue to escape the "kwaresma" of the Philippines. In the failure of it, as it is bound for a lot us, we always will have the humor to make us live. If anyone finds the movie funny, maybe his life had been the same. Jess may be a lowly driver in the movie but he, in real life can be a nursing student, an M.D. who takes up nursing, a chatter who dreams to be a mail-order bride.

I was not able to finish the movie. I did not know what happened to Jess. But does it really matter?

bikini open

I also have seen the last outing of Jeffrey Jeturian who I am a believer of. The sex part of this comedy had been gravely sanitized to suit the qualities of an SM-friendly-movie. And we begin to imagine that capitalism is becoming blatant is its control of what the public should see. The future of the movies will be a Disney movie. So I have not seen the Seiko movie I came to the theater for. The movie comments on the exploitation of media all in the name of the ratings game. And hapless are the subjects who are dragged into the national television with their lives exposed.

The heart is present but its execution was poorly done. Lines were vintage gay beauty pageant boo-boos left unpolished. There are no memorable oneliners that one can utilize for future use to fake witticisms. It is disheartening for sex siren Francine Prieto to have uttered just one line all throughout the movie. Or she maybe be thanking the writers of sparing her of the burden to memorize.

The CEB may have its good intention on proper places in giving tax rebates for Filipino films. To save the moribund cinema industry may be the moving force of their generosity. But I clamor for more discriminate rating. If that would their models of an A and B rated film, then movies in this part of the world are clearly deteriorating.
But I would still be in a constant vigil for more quality films to come. I may lose some faith but well, not entirely.